Friday, December 30, 2016

Life is Boring

Disclaimer : I am in no good mood and feeling very down at the moment because I am going to spend New years Eve alone... Well, I know, it may not be very big deal but the worst part for me which is breaking me inside is even my kid is not with me.. This is like... I don't have any words. So, if you don't want to feel negative, please don't read this post. I do have a great news to share but I will be doing that in some happy moment.

Have you ever felt loser kind of feeling when you see facebook pictures of your friends and their happening lives, or when you see a group of friends laughing loudly at some public place without worrying about anything or when you see some family in car or at shopping mall or at some picnic or a couple on a bike in romantic pose or say like there is no reason to go home.... I know, my heart is focusing on wrong things at this moment and I am also sure that I won't be in this negative mood for long time. I will be back to my jolly mood soon. But when you have none with you to celebrate something or no one to share something while whole world is in the some festive mood, it's very lonely feeling.
My coworker was upset since her friends went to some beach trip for new years without her. I told her that we could party together, her response was that will be super boring. I am experiencing this for long time now. Younger people even if they are my-type ones, they feel awkward with me for such fun activities. And my friends are always busy or with their families.. Yaar... I don't even have movies with me at this moment... I don't want to watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S or PLL... I don't want to watch idiot box either.

Now, I have actually planned few good things for quite some time now.  After the success (Hint: the great news story that I will be posting about in good mood), I had planned for many thing including few treks, adventurous activities, attending some live-in-concerts or plays, few spas, shopping for myself, some girly shopping, some me-time and what not. (Actually, everything I had felt in heart to do in last 2 months, had postponed it for after "success"). I have also my creative to-do list ready and want to make many things that wanted my time. But since I am upset, I am no creative at this time. I am not sleeping too. I actually want to spend my weekend with some of my planned tasks as above but I guess, it would be only grocery shopping, vegetables shopping, cleaning, organizing, cooking, washing and scrolling through other people's lives in feeds.

I know myself.... I know I wont be in negative mood for long. Just wanted to write it down to clear the clouds. Once clouds are clear, it will be sunshine again.


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