Friday, September 26, 2014

Hello.... How are You?

I am drafting posts in my mind for this blog since many days. But due to baby-work-life balance, couldn't do till now. However, today I listened this on radio and I felt my readers would be asking me this question.... Hello... How are you?

I just want to say, I am good, and yes, I will be back soon with my posts. 

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Singing in my Dream

Dreams and I had a long history. No, I am not talking about the dreams that I kept on seeing with my open eyes and do all the things to achieve them. But I am talking about the dreams in my beauty sleep. Most of the times my dreams make some sense and I strongly believe that using them as the medium the nature and the God give me hints about my future life. Most of the times my dreams have some logic and some meaning. They are so creative that several times my mother feels that they are my creations.

Anyways, so lovely dream started my day today. In my dream I had gone to some workshop along with my friends. The participants contained bunch of my friends, my relative and some special people too.  It was really some workshop that I didn't need to attend but I just went with friends. The workshop was something that I had already done. They were few tricks for maths and puzzles.  We were given some task to solve some puzzles. While we were solving the puzzles the music was playing in the background. And then suddenly came this song... and I murmured that I was just listening to this song before I came to this workshop. In my dream I actually listened the song and I started singing it in real life. God! My mother... She woke up and just smiled by seeing my craziness.
So, I was singing this song when I woke up and I was feeling so happy.

Dreams are the only way where we see our near and dear ones who are away from us physically and when we get up from the dream we actually feel that we had met the person. So, it has been so long (several months) that I haven't seen someone's face. I have the feeling of watching that special someone now and I have the strength again and I am strong. Anyway, in reality I heard this song after long time. Oh God.... you know...

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Pahle to Kabhi Kabhi

2-3 days back when I was surrounded with many people and people were talking to me, suddenly felt that lonely feeling in heart and heart started singing this.

Ahh, Alchemist.... Heart always knows everything. We just have to pay attention.
Anyways, so once again it is proved that, 'Ieshwar ke alawa aur kahi mann lagaya to ant me rona hi padta hai....' (means if you love anybody else than the almighty God, you will have to cry in the end).

Once again will say the thing that I experience always.... People come and go.... Life moves on...

Thank You God, for giving me opportunity to taste most of the flavors of life....

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Enjoying DAUGHTERhood along with MOTHERhood

After so many years, I am with my parents at my hometown for long duration. As you are aware, I am on maternity leave and as per customs and traditions, am at parents’ home. This is just the perfect life of enjoying being daughter and being mother, both at the same time.

The life as a mother had started very tired and confused. I didn’t know how would I handle this baby. But my family made everything so simpler. The baby was up whole night and used to cry. It was my younger brother, my mother and my father who used to stay up all night turn by turn and hold the baby.

My parents would ask me to take rest as much as possible as I would be exhausted by breast feeding. Mother would provide me food, snacks, drinks and everything (that was allowed to eat and drink) one after another. I had gained weight too.

This is my city and I would just get up and go out for any outside work or sometimes, just without any reason. My mother would care for baby absolutely fine. When I went to my very own old library the first day, I met my old well-wishers and I felt very happy. That happiness on my face gave me confidence in mirror that “I can be back… I am not lost… I am still there…. Yes, Baby is here… he is priority… but I am also here…” Then roaming in the evening on my favorite time was my favorite task. Similarly, in the afternoon when my baby used to sleep tight, I would just get out in the sun and feel that “cool” feeling. I would smile remembering my love theory. “ If you don’t feel heat in bright sun and feel cold like its starry night… then definitely you love somebody more than anything… yes, I love myself the most… I want to enjoy my life to the fullest. And my lips used to sing that old stanza I used to sing   “Yeh shahar hai Saving Savy Pinkey ka, yaha ki Fiza hai niraali…. Yaha pe sab Shanti-shanti hai…” While I used to ride or drive to the God very early in the morning, it was time for my old style of wishing good morning to whole India.

When initially, I didn’t had confidence to drive my car, it was my father who hired driver here and asked him to just accompany me while I was driving. My father took me and baby to pilgrim place. My father knew how much I loved to going different places and so the baby is. Using my kangaroo bag, my father too used to take his grandson for ride. My father brings always the best for me. He not only takes care of me, but every possession I have.

I am so happy here now where I am enjoying being daugeter so much and yes, these are the most happy days with my son too. I am spending so much time with my son. I am chatting with him all day, we listens to songs and dance sometimes together (offcourse, baby in my hand). Sometimes I make enjoy baby watching my dance. Intillegnt he is, he tries to copy the things. Mother and  I had taught him so many things that make his hands, legs and all parts of body, move. My mother taught him the greetings within first 10 days. 

I can never finish this post in the drafts as there are countless things my parents do and are doing for me. But before departure post, logically I am forced to publish this post and hence stopping here.
Just to say, I was very happy in these last few months…. God, Thank You….

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Post-Natal Depression.....?

I was on record time low for my confidence.  I am feeling people don't love me. The loved ones are forced to be away. I met people who just value money more than human beings. Whatever I had planned for my maternity leave is not getting executed. I am failing in everything. Being aware of the fact by experience, too much of love results in broken heart, hurting and pain only. I am feeling that one day my baby whom I love so much, will leave me. I am just not able to do any desired things and when I took an hour for myself and was very happy in that, "Mom's Guilt" surrounded my heart later. 

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My so-called near n dear ones are not caring for my wish anymore and just doing all the ..... in the world. I am feeling like I am going to fall in a deep and blacky dark well. I just don't know what is being served in front of me. This is the same feeling I had before leaving my hometown for my big job, the same feeling before my wedding. But that time at-least there was some hope. This time I am feeling all negative.... like I have nobody in whole world.  Generally, the people who motivate me whenever I am low, sense it and destiny makes some reason so that they contact me. Nothing like that is happening now and I too not getting any excuse to talk to those friends. The big thing is I am not meeting my "God" too. One of my failure is restricting me to go to temple daily and not seeing God and no worshipping is making me more sad. Maybe God is with me... No, I mean I am sure, God is with me... But I am not with God.  At one moment, I am feeling that I just have given up before even fighting the battle and at other moment I just don't know how to face and handle the things. At one moment, I don't want to go away from somebody but some other is forcing me to do so. I am doing nothing, I am just nowhere and I am none. I want to get-up and get going but I am not able to do so. I am just shedding my tears in shower and I don't know the reason. 
Am I afraid by the new responsibility? Don't know. Am I feeling sad because I am not independent now? Yes, that may be the reason. But then if that would be the reason,  I have plans to overcome but why I am not able to execute them? I know love will fill this heart again. But I can't pass this moment. I know Winning will become my habit once again but losing now is terrible.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Baby Boy....!!!

Blessed with


Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Okay... but I know....

Many times, you just don't have to say it. Your heart knew it... Somewhere deep inside you had accepted it too and life is like that only.
Saving Savy Pinkey never asks questions to herself she don't have answers for... or she never thinks about why and this should or this should not types.... She just accepts life as it is. She sees the life as third person.

My 30 Before 30 Dreams - Progress Update... Before Baby arrives in Life

So getting pregnant doesn't mean that I am taking a break in my goals. Goals will be those only. The only thing now, time will differ for achieving different goals. Update is baby can arrive any time now and I will be bit busy with baby few days afterwards so just want to try to keep things in place so that I can start off good.
Anyway, good thing is that I have nothing to lose. I will only win in all the cases. So below goes my official 30 before 30 dreams list.

1.       Publish a book of Recipes. -- Well, many are in drafts of my food blog. Yet, I think, it is okay collection, though not yet organized as per the theme. So, I will mark this as 05% done. 
2.       Publish a book of Mummy's g designs. -- Actually, started working on this, first draft is ready too and it seems this will be achieved next couple of months. I already had collected 40+ designs. So, 50% done.
3.       Publish a book of Rangoli. - Not started yet. 0%
4.       My own album as a singer. -- Life is good, I have recorded some songs too. 20%
5.       Get a handycam. I want to shoot most of my moments. -- I want this to do as early as possible. Now, there is so much new in life to shoot. But right now, no cash for this. 0%.
6.       Painting. I want to create a big painting for my home. -- I will definitely do this soon. 0%
7.       Taking family and friends at pilgrim place. -- Right now, I am not able to travel even in the city, so seems little bit far away now. 0%.
8.       Be a columnist in a newspaper or magazine. -- Working on this. 1%.
9.       Win a competition of photography anywhere and get a DSLR camera. -- Not actually yet participated. But looking for competitions. 0.5%
10.   Win a singing competition anywhere. -- 0%
11.   Chanting 2000*108 mantras. -- This is the one which is going great right now. Not 108, but I have one counter and as per it I have done 1648 mantras (i.e. 15*108 mantras). Yeah, long way to go, but being on bed rest, this is the one I can do the best and it will be helpful for baby too. 5%
12.   Publish ebooks on technical topics. -- :(   0%
13.   Go on family vacation with my mother and father. -- 0%
14.   Mediate daily to find myself. -- This is what I am doing daily and its going good. 20%
15.   Learn a new language. -- 0%
16.   Learn a form of dancing. -- 0%
17.   Talk with a friend and relative once in a week.  -- Going good. I have even found out my gang's 8 members who were like not on the planet. One more time realized, people disconnect with world, in the tragic times, as they don't want others to see them sad. 30%.
18.   Write handwritten letters twice in a month. -- 0%
19.   Grow 30*3= 90 plants. -- Only 1 done. I am in no control of my home and outside shopping right now. 0.5%
20.   Read 50 books. -- Finished. Already done with 50 books. 100%. I think, I can increase the number in long run.
21.   Walk/exercise 5 times a week. -- Small walk is done but it depends on my health. There are days when I am just on bed. 0.1%.
22.   Start business for knitting/crochet/photographer. -- Knitting is what I am doing on bed, and okay with it. 2%
23.   Spend whole night at the beach under open sky. This is an awesome experience. -- When I will do this.. :( I want to go somewhere, away from all this. 0%
24.   Make a photo wall in my home. -- Again same situation, right now I am in no control of my own home and other things. 0%
25.   Get a different certification or degree. -- Surfing for this. 0.1%
26.   Learn a new skill. -- Done, Car driving was the skill I acquired. 100%
27.   Adopt a child to provide all education. -- Actually tried with NGO Care India, but this is not what I actually wants so still searching alternative. 0.1%
28.   Build a temple. I want to build a temple; I will try my best for this. But practically thinking, if this is not possible, I will set an alternative for this as JivDaya forum. I will free up cows, birds that are taken to be killed. -- 0%
29.   Go deep inside the sea/Bathe under Niagara/Skydiving. -- :(   0%
30.   Go to Antartika, the last continent, and I know, this may not be possible so I will have it’s alternative goal set as well – Visit snow mountains at the place that I had not seen earlier and enjoy skiing. -- Not sure,when this will happen now, let's see. 0%

    Okay, so 2 down and 28 remaining. Lets see what all things happen first and which take back seat for now.

    Mere Saath Hai Tu...

    Pinkey had always strongly believed in telepathy. She has experienced n-number of times the connection between her deep near n dear ones n her deep inside of heart. The dreams she sees in her beauty sleep represents the same.


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